7 Habits of Highly
Successful Teens Habit 5
5. Seek first to understand, and then to
be understood
Because most people don’t listen very well, one of the
great frustrations in life is that many don’t feel understood. This habit will
ensure your teen learns the most important communication skill there is: active
listening.
Why is this habit the key to communication? It’s because
the deepest need of the human heart is to be understood. Everyone wants to be
respected and valued for who they are- a unique, one-of-a-kind ,
never-to-be-cloned individual. People won’t expose their soft middles unless
they feel genuine love and understanding. Once they feel it, however, they will
tell you more than you may want to hear. People don’t care how much you know
until they know how much you care.
Listen with your eyes, heart, and ears. 7 percent of communication
is contained I the words we use. The rest comes from body language (53 percent)
and how we say words, or the tone and feeling reflected in our voice (40
percent).
Most people are eager to talk and had rather talk than
listen. We have one mouth and two ears. This means we should listen twice as
much as we talk. Listen to listen to learn.
Listen, really listen, for understanding.
Seek first to understand then to be understood—LISTEN.
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